Toilets

There are Western toilets. There are "third-world" toilets. And then there are Japanese toilets. No need to describe the Western variety, so let's dive right into the third world kind. Let's just say these toilets are more like holes in the ground, decorated with a nice ceramic hood to catch the pee. We call them squatters. Though they are fairly inventive, they certainly don't do a good job. These toilets, without fail, stink. The floors is always soaking wet, either because people can't aim or because of the hose used for cleaning your butt. Also, they normally do not have a flush, so a bucket of water with a scoop is supplied to flush down your business. And all this escalated of course by the open garbage can of used toilet paper you are squatting over because in no way can this be flushed. This makes for a lovely time in flip flops!
But then, well then there are Japanese toilets. They truly deserve a word better than toilet because they are worlds away from what you think. They are sparkling clean ceramic machines equipped with more buttons than one knows what to do with. The moment you enter the stall, you can avoid the embarrassing sound of peeing by pressing the music button, which starts the fake flushing sound and will continue through the duration of your bathroom visit.And have no worry, you can always control the volume. God, what if someone hears you pee! No need for toilet paper as there are a variety of controls for cleaning. And of course there are different settings for males and females. You can choose the single spray or the shower spray. A number of buttons will also control the pressure of water as well as the temperature. Have no fear, as if the toilet seat wouldn't be heated!